We're Gonna Make It
by HardyGurl94
Summary: A story I wrote for a Creative Writing assignment in English. Set in Season 4, but not really according to the things that happen. So slightly AUish. All mistakes are mine Season 4 hasnt screened in my country yet . Sam's observations on his brother.


Hiya, all! This is just a story I wrote for a creative writing assignment for my English class.  
It is set in S4, but some things are a little different from the way things have gone down in the series.....so, all continuity errors are mine.  
I got an A for this =D

NB: I know what ya'll are thinking....and yes, I WILL be updating my other two SN stories! I havent updated in over half a year, and I'm so sorry for that! Hope ya'll forgive me. I'm working on them at the moment, but wont post any new chapters until I've finished the whole story. So, stay tuned!

Oh, and PLEASE R&R!!

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Heads turned to glare as the cool night air rushed in from behind the stranger silhouetted in the open doorway. The rush of air permeated the smoky ambience that had been a few hours in the making.

I was honestly surprised to see my brother here. Over the last few weeks that our latest gig had taken up, he had been spending less time preparing and more time frequenting the larger bar uptown.

I watched as my normally observant brother sat down at the far end of the bar, sliding wearily onto the barstool; his back to me. I breathed sigh of relief. I hadn't been seen.

My brother's dark blonde hair was plastered to his scalp from the rain, accentuating the dark circles that hung under his eyes. The normally vivid green sat dully in his face, blending in with the pale pallor of his skin. His wan features stood sharply in contrast to his usual attire; jeans, dark shirt, dark jacket. His worn leather jacket hung wet and limp off his frame. My heart ached for him.

But what really tore me up inside was the haunted look in his eyes. The knowledge that it was _my own _fault was what awoke me most nights, leaving me breathless and panting, a cold sweat dampening the sheets.

I knew that what had happened to my brother while he was away was too horrific to put into words. I knew this because I was the one who was startled awake from my brief lapses of consciousness to the sound of muffled cries. The four months we had spent apart had formed a deep rift in our relationship; one suffering a pain like no other, and the other suffering in his own personal hell. And for once in my life, I didn't know if this was a barrier we could overcome.

I watched my brother swirl the golden liquid around in his glass, his eyes vacant and staring. Three years ago, omnipotent was the word to describe my brother. He was in pain; the loss of our mother when we were children still burned in the backs of our minds. But he refused to open up, and every time I broached the subject, I could see his mental walls go up and lock in place. His whole life, he had hidden his pain behind a mask of humor and witty remarks, and quickly became an expert at evading talking about his feelings or problems. Instead, he busied himself with fixing other peoples problems, namely his younger brother, me.

But the loss of our father nearly tore him apart. It was his death that opened my brother's eyes up to the realization that we were _not_ invincible, and that family was the one thing we had left. It scares me, I admit, that my brother would be prepared to give up his own life to protect my own.

I was snapped out of my reverie when a shadow fell across my vision. I looked up, startled. My brother stood in front of me, brow furrowed, arms crossed.  
'What are you doing here?' he asked, wearily untangling one of his arms to run is fingers through his hair.

I looked down, abashed. 'Research.' I muttered, the lie falling lamely from my lips.

My brother quirked an eyebrow. 'I see.' He glanced dubiously at the closed laptop.

He relaxed his stance, his hands falling to his sides. 'I'm going back to the motel.' He held his hand out for the key.

'No girls?' I asked, surprised. My brother was quite…fond of female company.

I expected him to make some sarcastic remark, but he just shook his head. 'I'm not in the mood.'

My heart plummeted to my feet. 'I was just about to head back, anyway.' I focused on keeping the waver from my voice.

'Fine.' He nodded curtly, snapping his fingers back so that they clenched lightly in a fist. He turned, reaching for the door.

Few people turned to look as we left.

~~~SN~~~

The ride home was silent and uncomfortable. I could almost physically feel the tension building in the air, and as my heart thudded painfully in my chest, I realized that he was ready to talk.

'You look tired.' My voice cracked like a nervous twelve-year old's.

His grip tightened on the steering wheel, jaw clenched. ''m fine.' He muttered.

'I don't think you are.' I said quietly, tensing. Waiting for the onslaught.

I risked a glance at him.

His eyes shifted, meeting mine for a second. That's all it took. The walls went up.

'What's it to you, huh?' his voice shook, so unlike the clear, confident, _cocky _voice from my past.

'I'm your _brother_.' My eyes bored into the side of his head. All of a sudden, I felt confident, fuelled by anger and worry. 'You look like crap, man.'

'Look,' he started, taking one hand off the wheel and scrubbing it wearily over his face. He suddenly looked _much _older than his twenty-nine years. 'when I was gone, I, uh…changed. Life's different now, okay? You have to get over that and move on.'

I wasn't ready to accept that. _I _wasn't ready to move on. I'd expected something different. I thought he'd maybe speak of what happened when he left.

We sat in silence for a few minutes, the only sound being that of the tires roaring on the road.

'What I went through…' he trailed off, voice so soft it was barely audible. He sighed. 'I just don't think I can talk about that. Not yet. Not for a while.'

He turned his suddenly bright eyes towards me, imploring me to understand.

'Okay.' I said. 'I won't bring it up. But…' this time it was my turn to trail off.

He glanced over at me again, frowning. 'But what?'

'You're not coping.' I whispered. 'Please…let me help? You're not the only one suffering.'

I kicked myself. That was a low blow. I watched him flinch, hand clamping down on the steering wheel again. Suddenly, he sighed, deflating.

'I'm sorry. If it makes you feel better, you can help, okay?'

A weight lifted off my shoulders. 'Thanks.'

''s good.' A faint smile graced his lips. 'How 'bout we get some food, huh? I'm starving.'

A relieved laugh bubbled up inside my throat. A glimmer of hope suddenly appeared, and I grasped on to it like a lifeline. 'Sure.'

Maybe, just _maybe_, we'd be okay. I watched him turn the music up, the way he used to do, and I suddenly felt like we could take on whatever came our way.

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PLEASE R&R!!!! I LIVE for reviews. I'll give you cookies......XD


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